Genius. Criminal. Malcontent. Marriage cures all. What is the link between the decline in criminal behavior and marriage? Is it that the miscreant is finally getting a little on a regular basis? That his will has been crushed by the weight of responsibility? That it’s just too damned much effort supporting both a wife/family and an exciting life of crime? Whatever the reasons, perhaps it is time to consider marriage as a crime-fighting tool. We get a solution to overcrowded, overpriced prisons, and the criminal gets a nice stable family to help straighten him out. It may sound crazy, but surely it is no less so than using marriage to fight poverty.
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Oliphant Parts
Reframing Reality
Archives: July 2003
I sentence you to 10 years’ hard marriage, and a $40 fine!
FedEx: Randomly misdelivering packages the world over
It has been a week now since FedEx delivered a package that was destined for me. Too bad they somehow missed the destination address by 20 miles. In their defense, while the address they delivered to was in a different town, with a different zip code and a completely different street and street number, at least the street numbers both started with a 1 and had four digits. Never mind that the following three digits were all different, and that the address they have listed on their site as having delivered the package to is fictional, at least they tried.
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You want to put what WHERE?!
It’s a foggy morning, and the bumblebees are happily buzzing away at the yellow flowers outside my window. A less lazy writer than myself would learn what that plant is called, so that he or she could better describe it. I am not a less lazy writer, which probably explains why I make money programming, not writing. How about a little online quiz? And I only got two wrong — woo-hoo!!! Kinda makes me wish I were still in the service . . .
Lookin’ for love . . .
It’s good seeing people doing their part for the war effort. In WWII, we had scrap-metal drives, ration cards, and war bonds. For the Iraq war, it’s half-priced sex. Do you think they’ll call it “Operation Enduring Erection”?
Welcome to my blog
So, this is a blog. This is only a blog. Were this an actual anything else, you would not be here. Once I get the style issues worked out, I’ll link this sucker up under my news section, and start blogging! Until then, I guess I’ll have to go back to shaving the cat for entertainment.
Moving To Moveable Type
On the off-chance that anyone actually looks at this — I will no longer be updating my news section. Now that I have joined the popular kids and set up my own blog, I am going to put my news there. So there. Quit reading this, damn it! Oh, in case you didn’t click on the link above, the new news is at <http://oliphantparts.org/>
Toast
Okay, so I am a few days late in noticing this, but ubergeek just updated their Intellitoast animation. Oh what fun! Okay, it’s a slow day for me.
Better things to do
Living in fear of prostate cancer? A few strokes a day keeps the doctor away, it appears! And I thought it was just good for putting hair on your palms and off your head. Okay, one last whack at this topic: No wonder I feel so old and tired . . . And now, back to the real world. But first, remember that the terrorists have won if we can no longer download mp3s off the internet! That has nothing to do with anything, does it?
Stroking It
Living in fear of prostate cancer? A few strokes a day keeps the
doctor away, it appears! And I thought it was just good for putting
hair on your palms and off your head. Okay, one last whack at this topic: No wonder I feel so old and tired . . . And now, back to the real world. But first, remember that the terrorists have won if we can no longer download mp3s off the internet!
Why Backups Are Important
I guess that’s what I get for not paying attention to my backups — I appear to have lost or overwritten some of my files. Okay, so I no longer have news from the past year. That would be a problem if anyone actually visited my site. So, a big thank you to the world for ignoring me and not exposing my stupidity!
License
- This weblog is licensed under a Creative Commons License.
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