Category Archives: News

Ohgodwereallgonnadie!!1!

Starfish at low tide

Starfish at low tide says "Relax, dummy!"

When I was growing up, General Electric claimed “We Bring Good Things To Life.” Sometime in the last decade or so, they must have accepted that this is not always so, as now they offer “imagination at work.” So, does providing a risky containment field count as “imagination at work” or as “bring(ing) good things to life”? Either way, I would have thought that forty years would be enough time for GE to focus a little less on imagination and a little more on reality. And to maybe consider that risking bringing an end to lives, good or otherwise, might not be such a good thing. (pssst! There’s a NAUGHTY WORD later in this post (although in all fairness, it is balanced out by being attached to a picture of kittens), so don’t click on the continue link if you are offended by NAUGHTY WORDS!!!!!!!1!!!ONE!!!ELEVENTY!!! Continue reading

Tsunami A Wash

Most of the local schools are closed, low-lying areas have been evacuated, and they have begun rolling blackouts, just to make it more exciting. So far, though, this tsunami has been a bit of a bust. That is a good thing, right?

Since we had no power, we spent the morning at the Beachcomber Cafe in Trinidad and occasionally wandered over to the old lighthouse to join the crowds gathered there to see the sea. It did many sea-like things. What it did not do was come rushing in and wash away the Trinidad pier. No destruction is a good thing, considering how many houses are built on or below sea level in Eureka and Arcata and in between.

And now, back to work.

A Weekend of Russian Brides and Erectile Dysfunction

Hopefully nobody received spam from me this weekend. If so, I apologize, and hey, suck it up! I am not sure, but I think my main email account was compromised for a few hours, judging by all of the bounceback messages filling my inbox Saturday morning. Apparently, I was advertising Sexy Russian Brides and various erectile dysfunction meds. Considering that I prefer my brides imaginary and fully support dysfunctional erections, it obviously was not me sending out this crap. Continue reading

Come again?

(warning, some may find my included links NSFW)

Some days you learn way more than you ever wanted to know, whether it be about home remedies for depression, or the latest in yoghurt toppings.

I am still trying to decide if the PT article is an attempt to convince women to have more unprotected sex with psychologists (“Hey baby, what’s your sign? Want a little injection of antidepressant?”) or completely serious. Somehow I missed the sourced article in Scientific American, although I am guessing it was only in the online version, not the print version. Continue reading

Tear Down The Wall

Ugh. So tired. I think I’m done, ready to wrap up this blog and throw it away. Words are useless, painful things that distract me from the task at hand. I write code now, not stories or bad poetry. And I refuse to blog about code. Is there any point in continuing with this thing? If there is, I don’t see it. I’ve noticed a lot of other blogs going by the wayside as their authors wised up and moved on with their lives. It is time I did the same.

WTF Democrats?

WTF Democrats? Health care should be simple. We have a majority in the House and Senate, and a Democrat in the White House. We easily won the Presidential elections less than a year ago. By Republican standards, we have a mandate to do whatever the fuck we want. Why, then, are we constrained by the Republicans and their obstructionist practices? Screaming loudly and making shit up does not constitute valid opposition. If it did, we could replace the entire Republican party with a pack of chimpanzees (Seqways optional). We would get a lot more done, and I am pretty sure a lot less shit would get flung.

You are wasting our majority and any chance at real reform. Compromise with the self-branded “party of no” does not do anything other than prove that we are not serious about reform. Really, are we trying to pass reform, or is this all just posturing to try to appease those of us in the party who hoped for change? It’s starting to feel like Max Baucus and the rest of the insurance company shills are the only ones who have a voice in this. Let’s ignore the birthers, baggers and bitters and just reform health care. No compromise, no consensus building, just fix it. And when you’re done, maybe pull your collective head out of your collective ass and drop this anti-Acorn nonsense. Surely there’s a Dem somewhere between the White House, Senate and House with a spine.

Today’s Helpful Tips

So here are a couple of tips I’ve picked up over the past two days. Hopefully they will help you in your quest to become, every day and in every way, a better you.

  1. Avoid the DMV if you have a warrant out for your arrest.
    I had to renew my license this morning (thanks, Idaho, for not sending out renewal notices. Yeah, that policy won’t cause more people to drive around with expired licenses). While paying for my license, several police officers rushed in and grabbed a woman who was taking a test. Hmm . . . so all of the employees are wearing shirts emblazoned with “Kootenai County Sheriff’s Department” and you’ve just given the woman at the counter your license information, yet you’re still surprised when the police show up to arrest you for a Failure To Appear. It’s a puzzler how they figured out where you were, isn’t it?
  2. Maybe wait a few months if you were thinking of outing yourself as a Furrie.
    Thanks to a penchant for partying like a panda, this guy is probably not going to reflect well on your newfound hobby. At least he wasn’t banging white bitches screwing the pooch (yes, I updated that after realizing it was malamutes, not samoyeds. You’d think that at least some of the 13 years I spent working in a veterinary hospital would have stuck with me). Um, ick? Yeah, still not a positive furry role model. Whatever happened to a good old-fashioned yiffpile?

Hooking

Got hayfever, or maybe a touch of MS? The good news is we’ve found the cure. the bad news is it sucks. So, we need a bit of muck to keep us from getting polio, and a few worms to keep us from getting allergies. Will leeches cure my thyroid annoyance?

Salmonella is not a flavour enhancer

It is great news like this that has me convinced I have to continue to get off my lazy ass occasionally and help Jennie with the garden and livestock. Considering our climate, it isn’t realistic to think that we would be able to grow and raise all of our own food, but we can at least greatly reduce the amount we get from unknown sources. Paying to be poisoned is not my idea of fun.

Our local farmers’ markets should be starting up soon, which will be nice. Fresh lamb, and all those veggies we forgot to plant, or just cannot get to grow — yum! Some year soon we will have our own stall at the market, selling lamb, chicken, eggs and knapweed (our most successful crop ever!). The kids could start a side business, selling the rotten eggs to their friends.

Talk To Me

Please, if there is a god, keep Sarah Palin talking! Hell, I don’t care, even if there is no god, keep her talking. This woman is a special kind of dumb. And to think, this is the second-best person the Republicans could find to represent their party. At this point, I assume the plan is to lose the election so that the next four years of Great Depression II can be blamed on the Democrats. No matter that our current problems can be laid solely at the feet of the Republicans. Thanks, you evil fuckers. Now, could someone explain how Bush came up with $700 billion as the cost for the bailout? I thought a Paraguay retirement would be a hell of a lot cheaper than that.

Oh right, here’s how they came up with $700 billion — they pulled it out of their collective ass.