News(ish)
Oh hey, a busy news day today! Sure, most of it is yesterday’s news, but I like at least scanning it again in my morning paper. Immigration? Yeah, sure, already read it, don’t care because I haven’t a clue as to what to do (except maybe fan the flames occasionally and say “Well, it was THEIR damned country before it was our’s . . . “). Jill Carroll? Who cares what she said in her video? Idiots: If you’re being held hostage, are you going to refuse to make a video that may possibly save your life and let you be free again? If so, more power to you, but the rest of us kind of like life. Ah, local news.
“Police look into possible intimidation of 9-year-old”
Now there’s a heartwarming headline. Looks like some winner of a mom doesn’t want to face charges for child abuse. So, her response? Tell the kid to lie, that it is his fault the family is being torn apart, and that she can’t buy him a $6,000 ATV because she has to give the money to a lawyer. I think the kid is going to be better off in foster care. Tell me again why we can’t have people like this spayed?
“Probe traces leak to Bush”
Okay, the fourteen-year-old boy in me giggles hysterically over headlines like that, but really, so what? We know we have the most corrupt, anti-American, treasonous government in history at this point (hell, we’d invade any other country that worked so hard to destroy the U.S. and our way of life, wouldn’t we?), so a little more corruption is no big deal at this point. Next?
“ADHD SKIN PATCH CLEARED FOR KIDS”
Not sure why they needed to shout that one out, but we’ve got all caps this time. Great. Hope nobody gets their smoking patch confused with their ADHD patch. Worse yet, the birth control patch confused with the ADHD patch. Pregnant AND bouncing off the walls. Okay, maybe that’s not worth mentioning either.
Skipping drunk flowers, the goodness of Judas, ski patrol dies in hole and stinky Danish cheese once again infiltrating Saudi stores. What does that leave us with?
“Bush sharply criticized by member of audience” and “GAO cites skyrocketing costs for Hanford plant”. Both great headlines. First, how the heck did someone critical make it past the screening process and into the Bush audience? Must be a serious failure of intelligence (and no, there is no pun intended there). Or should we look back at our leaky Bush headline above and consider this to be part of a greater plot? By letting one malcontent through, does our president give the impression of actually facing a real audience? I think the only way to answer that question is in Bush’s own words: “They have miscalculated me as a leader.”
Okay, Hanford it is. Or isn’t. Damn, time for work. I can look back on Hanford later, assuming something actually interesting doesn’t occur between now and whenever.
Good morning, by the way. The sun is shining, the fog is burning off, and my ears and nose have almost thawed out from my morning soak in the hot tub. Nothing like sitting in a pool of water while a cold wind blows through. Almost makes me want to stand up and see how much shrinkage I could achieve . . .
